Blackhawks News

Chicago Blackhawks’ Summer Fun Activites

By Nick Heupel
Apr 9, 2016; Columbus, OH, USA; Chicago Blackhawks fans hold signs from the stands for Blackhawks defenseman Duncan Keith (not pictured) and goalie Corey Crawford (not pictured) during the game against the Columbus Blue Jackets at Nationwide Arena. Mandatory Credit: Aaron Doster-USA TODAY Sports
Apr 9, 2016; Columbus, OH, USA; Chicago Blackhawks fans hold signs from the stands for Blackhawks defenseman Duncan Keith (not pictured) and goalie Corey Crawford (not pictured) during the game against the Columbus Blue Jackets at Nationwide Arena. Mandatory Credit: Aaron Doster-USA TODAY Sports /
facebooktwitterreddit

Summer Is In Full Effect For The Chicago Blackhawks

While most NHL players will enjoy sunny days on the links and rinse away the taste of defeat, Stan Bowman’s Chicago Blackhawks will be engaging in more wholesome and enriching experiences.

Andrew Shaw Will Attend Art Camp

In art camp, the young Blackhawks forward will get in touch with his sensitive side and learn how to express himself more creatively by exploring various visual-art mediums. During his retreat, Shaw will be able to enjoy weekly movies in the park. On the viewing schedule: Brokeback Mountain and Milk.

The camp will also feature guest lectures from local artists, including an inspirational speech from a 15-year-old sculptor, sharing how he overcame his strong urge to use the “F” word, among other slurs. Opponents beware: Shaw will be bringing the heat in the upcoming season with all new, more creative, chirps and digs.

Look Out, Japan!

Duncan Keith and his family will be touring the island nation this summer. The Keiths will visit the ancient imperial capital of Kyoto, famous for its beautiful landscapes and the thousands of Buddhist temples and shrines.

More from Blackhawks News

The ‘Hawks defenseman will learn to practice presence of mind, and he will discover the many spiritual benefits of meditation. Of course, Keith will also return to Chicago a newly minted master of sticks. Eating with chopsticks will surely help Keith to exercise delicacy and precision: keep the sticks low and in control.

Need To Update Your Headshot?

Amateur actors in Los Angeles can catch a break this summer with some free photo shoots, courtesy of Blackhawks defenseman Brent Seabrook. The veteran D-man has gotten into trouble for his tendency to hit opponents too high. This summer, he will be interning with a professional photographer in Silver Lake.

From behind the camera, he will be able to explore his fascination with heads, learning how to line up his shots in a more professional manner. The Department of Player Safety will have to admire the tasteful and artistic headshots that Seabrook will be producing by summer’s end. Hopefully Seabrook will learn to keep his hobby off the ice.

Patrick Kane Will Enjoy A Quiet, Uneventful Summer

Chicago’s Wonderboy will be volunteering at various state penitentiaries in New York, playing board games with prison inmates. Kane is looking forward to playing some of his long-time favorites: Sorry, Mousetrap, Trouble, Chutes and Ladders, Life and Clue.

The non-profit organization hosting Kane has stated it will not allow the goal-hungry forward to play the card game Speed because his hands are so fast, it’s considered cheating. The superstar will gain a new perspective on the criminal justice system, and he will return to training camp rested and ready to focus on next season.

chicago blackhawks
chicago blackhawks /

Captain Serious, The GOAT

The Second City training center will be welcoming Blackhawks captain Jonathan Toews this summer for improv comedy classes. Captain Serious will learn and laugh alongside Chicago’s aspiring comedians before heading to Montana to work on a goat farm.

Toews may already be destined for the Hockey Hall of Fame, but he did not want to pass up the opportunity to work with real-life, active goats. Through this immersive experience, the ‘Hawks captain will be able to learn the ways of the goat, so that he too may one day be the GOAT.

chicago blackhawks
chicago blackhawks /

Winning Together

The rest of the team will be engaged in group activities to help foster teamwork and chemistry. A few players will form a roller-derby dance squad. They will be competing around the country, learning how to win on two skates. Teuvo Teravainen and a few others plan on entering eating contests at county fairs.

Next season, hard-hitting teams will be frustrated when their checks are bouncing off the Chicago skaters. Andrew Desjardins will lead a group of Blackhawks skaters in a summer science project. The brainiacs will be working feverishly to erect the 7-foot-4 ghoul who will be next year’s rookie sensation. Might get a few good goals on deflections off his neck bolts.

facebooktwitterreddit